Why not one rule fits this catalogue
The same shape holds for nearly every fit question here: what size should I order? The honest answer is that it depends on the style, because That’s A Awful Lot Of Cough Syrup publishes its fit guidance product by product, not once for the range. True to size is the line most pieces are published with. On two of the tees the cut runs small enough that the brand asks you to go one or two sizes bigger. A further two pieces fit true to size relaxed fit tee while asking you to size up for the oversized look. Returns happen exactly when one rule is applied anyway, because those instructions cannot be folded into one.
The missing size chart, and what that means for you
The brand has never published a global size chart. A general sizing chart and a separate t-shirt size chart, its own sizing pages, render without any chart content as of September 2026. Far from being a temporary outage, that is the state of the site. Which means the product description is your only authoritative source on fit, and a full read is worth the minute. Any measurement table for alocs clothing on a resale listing, a blog or a lookalike store is somebody else’s reconstruction, not a published figure. Treat those charts as guesses, because that is what they are.
The range of sizes you are choosing from
First, what is actually available. With small through extra-large on nearly every style, apparel runs XS to 3XL. The top end is narrower than it looks: 3XL appears on 48 products, so a 3XL buyer shops a subset of the catalogue. Denim and workwear are not on that ladder, but sized by waist from 28 through 44. For kids, sizes run 2/3, 4/5, 6 and 8. What follows is organised by situation, and every instruction quoted comes from the brand’s own copy.
When the style is true to size
Published as true to size: the Classic Cough Syrup T-Shirt, Hoodie and Sweatpants, the Dickies Button Down, the Dodger T-shirt, the Double Cup Cargo Shorts, the Women’s Booty Shorts, and the King Of The Kill, Drankenstein and Juicebusters tees. This is the default across most of the catalogue and the easiest case. The classic tees carry a relaxed-fit description, so true to size already means a roomier body than a fitted tee. Order the size you normally wear for all of these. A relaxed medium, not a slim one, is what your normal medium gets you in a classic awful lot of cough syrup shirt. Extra room is the next situation.
Where the page says to size up for an oversized fit
Misreading it is easy, because two styles carry a note that does two things at once. The Warning T-Shirt runs true to size, with the added line that for an oversized fit you should consider sizing up. The Double Cup Cargo Shorts put it slightly differently: they run true to size, and for an oversized fit you size up one. Take the instruction as conditional, not as a correction. The garment is not mis-sized at all; the brand is explaining how to reach a looser silhouette. The intended fit comes from your normal size; if you want it big, go one up and stop, because the note says one.
When the style runs small
The price of skipping the product copy is highest here. The Wok Is Dead T-Shirt and the Promethazine Tour T-Shirt carry an explicit warning: the style runs small, so order one or two sizes bigger than your regular size for a relaxed fit. Both are cropped, wide-fit tees in lightweight cotton jersey, rinsed for a vintage feel, with water-based prints front and back, unlike the heavyweight classic tee. The extra size buys length as much as width, since a cropped body is short by design. A large or extra-large is what that means here if your usual size is a medium. As an illustration of why one rule cannot cover thats an awful lot of cough syrup as a catalogue, this is the clearest.
Where flat measurements are published
Actual flat measurements appear on a few products, and they beat every rule of thumb. The Wok Is Dead and Promethazine Tour tees come with published width by length from the back: small 20 inches by 17.5, medium 21.5 by 19, large 23 by 20.5. The waist and inseam figures are given for the Double Cup Cargo Shorts: small 29.5 inches and 7.75, medium 31.5 and 8, large 33.5 and 8.5, extra-large 35.5 and 9, 2XL 37.5 and 9.5. To use them, lay flat a garment you own and like, measure armpit to armpit and collar seam to hem, then compare. More than any letter can tell you comes out of that comparison, and it assumes nothing. Use the measurements wherever they are published, and disregard everything else.
When you are buying bottoms
Bottoms run on a second logic, and it catches people out. The Classic Cough Syrup Sweatpants are published as fitting true to size, and sweatpants and sweat shorts sit on the XS to 3XL ladder. Because denim and workwear go by waist from 28 through 44, there is no letter to convert. The cargo shorts, the carpenter pants and the Dickies-based trousers are all covered by that. Nothing published converts between them, and the two systems do not map onto each other. Measure trousers you already wear rather than guessing when you are shopping alocs shorts and the listing offers a waist number.
When the product page says nothing at all
Where there is no fit note, and that is plenty of listings, judgement comes in. Since true to size is the published default wherever the brand does say something, it is the safest assumption. A 16 oz hoodie and a 6.5 oz tee behave very differently, so let the garment type guide you beyond that, and remember that heavier cloth is less forgiving. Since a lightweight cropped tee running small says nothing about a fleece sweatpant, no rule should be imported from one style onto another. Your usual size is the reasonable default for an awful lot of cough syrup hoodie with no note, and one up if you want it oversized. Choose one that does publish a note if the piece matters and the page is silent.
Style by style, what to order
The table gathers every published fit instruction in one place. The middle column carries what the brand says on the product page, and the right column turns it into a decision. Nothing has been published for a style that is absent, so the true-to-size default applies. Nothing in it is inferred from resale listings or reviews, or averaged into a general rule. Because products come and go every few weeks, read it alongside the product page, not instead of it. The whole table was checked in September 2026.
| Style | What the brand says about fit | What to order |
|---|---|---|
| Classic Cough Syrup T-Shirt | Fits true to size; relaxed fit | Your usual size |
| Classic Cough Syrup Hoodie | Runs true to size | Your usual size |
| Classic Cough Syrup Sweatpants | Fits true to size | Your usual size |
| King Of The Kill, Drankenstein, Juicebusters tees | Style fits true to size | Your usual size |
| Dickies Button Down, Dodger T-shirt, Women’s Booty Shorts | True to size | Your usual size |
| Warning T-Shirt | Runs true to size; for oversized fit, consider sizing up | Usual size, or one up for oversized |
| Double Cup Cargo Shorts | Runs true to size; for oversized fit, size up one | Usual waist, or one up for oversized |
| Wok Is Dead T-Shirt | Runs small; order 1-2 sizes bigger than your regular size | One or two sizes up |
| Promethazine Tour T-Shirt | Runs small; order 1-2 sizes bigger than your regular size | One or two sizes up |
| Any style with no published note | Nothing published | Usual size; one up for oversized |
A closing word on charts found elsewhere
The single point most likely to save you a parcel bears repeating: there is no published size chart for this brand. Whoever built the charts circulating under the brand’s name did it by measuring one garment or copying a template, and neither accounts for a catalogue where one tee runs small and another runs relaxed. The pages that would hold one load without any chart, and no gap is filled by the frequently asked questions. With a refund window of a month from purchase and return shipping paid by the customer, returns exist, so a wrong call is recoverable but not free. Three things are reliable: the per-product fit note, the published flat measurements where they exist, and a tape measure against something you own. Reading the copy properly is cheaper than posting a box back.
